New Delhi : The UPA government has decided to start on a clean slate this Dasara. To achieve the purpose, everyone concerned has been asked to give a clean chit to at least one more member of the political establishment. At the end of this week-long exercise, Prime Minister Dr Manmohan Singh will address the nation and declare that his government is the cleanest-ever in the history of independent India.
Sharad Pawar has given a clean chit only to himself, emphasizing he is neither responsible for farmers suicides, rotting foodgrain or India’s defeat in England.
S M Krishna has refused to give a clean chit to anyone. “I believe in having something written on paper, especially the kind Made in Portugal,” he said.
Karunanidhi has given daughter Kanimozhi a clean chit. Kani has given Anidmuthu Raja a clean chit. Raja has given industrialist Balwa a clean chit. Balwa has given Reliance a clean chit. Anil Ambani’s Reliance has given Amar Singh a clean chit. However, Amar Singh has refused to given anyone a clean chit, saying he is open to negotiations.
Vilasrao Deshmukh has chosen to give his son Riteish Deshmukh a clean chit, claiming he is in fact the best actor in India today.
MPs who had moved a privilege motion against Om Puri for his utterances against them at Ramlila Maidan have given the actor a clean chit, saying he uttered Ardhsatya in Aakrosh.
Rahul Gandhi has bowled a doosra, saying he will not give India a clean chit but he will give the other India that he is discovering – Bharat – a clean chit. Mom Sonia Gandhi, with khushi ke aansoo in her eyes, said she is proud of him.
Digvijay Singh has said he will give all Indians who vote for Rahul ji to become PM in 2014, a clean chit.
Mamta Banerjee has rubbished this clean-up drive. “What klean, klean. I say the need of the hour is Paribortan,” she said.
CWG scam accused Lalit Bhanot has given Suresh Kalmadi a clean chit, acknowledging his ability to clean up the CWG funds. Kalmadi however, has refused to give Bhanot a clean chit, saying staying with him at Tihar has shown him that Bhanot’s standards of hygiene and cleanliness are worse than Indian standards.
Kalanithi Maran will organise a talk show on Sun TV in which every participant will be asked to give a clean chit to Dayanidhi Maran.
Even opposition parties have taken a cue from the PM’s clean-up drive. Mayawati has ordered that all her statues in Lucknow should be cleaned twice a day.
Narendra Modi has given himself a clean chit, saying “fasting over, now i am clean” to which Shankersinh Vaghela said, “I fasted 12 hours more than him, so I am more clean. I should be CM.”
Nitin Gadkari has asked everyone in the BJP to give him a clean chit, as he has come clean of all the extra baggage.
Y S Jaganmohan Reddy has said his late dad YSR always gave him a clean chit and therefore he should be made CM of Andhra Pradesh.
Team Anna has asked Swami Agnivesh to come clean on which Kapil he was speaking to over phone, before aspiring for a clean chit. Anna has however advised Arvind Kejriwal and company to give a clean chit without doing any himsa. “Chahe clean chit ke liye jail bhi jaana pade to theek hai, lekin Kejriwal, himsa nahin,” he advised.